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It is not easy being a mom. It is actually pretty difficult to be a parent and most days it is a thankless job. Taking time for yourself as a mom is almost impossible at times.
I asked my husband for 30 minutes today to lie out by the pool. I needed 30 minutes of peace and quiet.
As I lie in the sun on the lounge chair, my mind couldn’t help but wander…”Did my husband feed the baby? Is she crying right now? When is the last time I pumped? What do I think they are doing? Should I go back inside? What do I need to get done today? Am I terrible mother choosing to miss out on this time with my kids? How is that other mom wearing a two piece? Maybe I should go to the gym after this…who has time for that? Should I be spending this time with my kids? They are only young for so long. There is only so much longer until they have to go back to daycare. Maybe I should quit my job.”
As a mother, I realize there really is no such thing as alone time.
I mean, I can’t even take a poop without my 3 year old wanting to sit in the bathroom with me. He hands me toilet paper, pretends to wipe me, and insists on flushing the toilet. My daughter is there, as well, tearing off as many little pieces of toilet paper she can.
It’s taken a while to realize that there is no longer “me” time.
Even if I am by myself, my children are still with me because I am constantly thinking about their well being. If I’m at the grocery store, I am thinking about their meals for the week. When I’m at the mall, I’m thinking about the perfect holiday outfit or a “just because” outfit. If I’m getting my hair cut, I’m thinking about how to cut my son’s hair by myself so I can save the ridiculous $20+ it costs to get his hair done at the kid’s salon. I think this is what it means to be a mom.
I will always think about my children before myself. Is that OK? I think it is.
In the end, does it make you a bad mom TRYING to have some time to yourself? Absolutely not. After all, the reason your children are who they are is because of you. However, I will enjoy my kids while I can. Time goes by too fast.
Tell yourself you are doing a great job, and continue on from there. And taking time for yourself as a mom is so hard, but it is so necessary at times.
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